Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Spring Awakening

Well, it was inevitable I suppose. The weather has warmed enough to melt the 3 foot pile of snow in my Western Pennsylvania yard down to 2.5 feet, so of course I was bound to see a sure sign of spring today. What was it, you ask? A crocus? A robin? No, no, something less….tangible. Examples of spring romance? No, something less…..beautiful. I am talking, of course, of incidents of vehicular asshattery.

All winter long, people tend to either not drive, because they are scared, or drive in an overly cautious manner the moment a single flake of snow touches the ground. For this reason, driving time to anywhere is tripled between the months of December and February, or in Western PA, October and April. But the moment the Spring Thaw appears to be around the corner, every driver forgets every driving law and skill they have learned since they were 16 years old.

I was on the road for exactly 25 minutes, long enough to go pay for my husband’s car inspection and get a Mac Snack Wrap for lunch, a total of maybe 5 miles, round trip, and during that time, I saw at least 8 counts of vehicular asshattery. It all culminated in the fact that a delivery truck was blocking the entrance to the ONE WAY street on which I live.

Dammit, I would have settled for a crocus.