Sunday, November 17, 2013

Nerd Love

What do you love most about yourself? What do you love most about your favorite person? Are the two connected?

While I think there are a lot of great things about myself, and even more great things about my favorite person, the thing I love best about us is who we are together.  My favorite person, unsurprisingly, is Hubby.  And I absolutely love who we are because of each other.

I have always had nerd tendencies.  I wrote about that during last year's NaBloPoMo.  Sometimes, I take a look at the kinds of music or movies I like, the hobbies I have, the people I follow on social media, and the things I talk about, and I realize that the older I get, the nerdier I get, and I love every minute of it.  If someone had told my 8th grade self, with my mile high bangs and my pegged jeans and my painful attempts at being cool, that I would proudly proclaim my nerd status, I would have laughed.  But that is exactly how it has played out.

Way back in the day, before Hubby was ever Hubby, or Fiance', or even Boyfriend, one of the things that I prevented me from dating him was I just was not sure we were compatible.  I was still too worried about conforming to conventional standards of beauty, sex appeal, and coolness.  I thought that I had to be a specific type of woman in order for men to like me.  And when I acted that way, conforming to standards that were not really my personality, I did attract men.  Awful, selfish, unfaithful, manipulative men with whom a successful adult relationship was impossible.

When I finally came to terms with the fact that some of those conventional standards were just not me, and not what I wanted out of life, I became happier, I opened up, and I found the love of my life, in Hubby.  The longer we are together, the more we are ourselves.  And what ourselves have turned out to be are gigantic, boardgame loving, video game playing, book hoarding, Doctor Who watching, indie rock obsessed, zombie chasing, Reddit reading, NERDS.

We are constantly having nerdventures.  We spread our love of our nerd icons all over the internet.  Our life is full of laughter, and love, and very very nerdy dancing.

So, go ahead and call me a nerd.  I take it as a compliment; it is the best thing about me, and the best thing about the greatest person I know.

NaBloPoMo November