Friday, November 29, 2013

The Beginning and the End

You're almost there! Tell us how you feel about endings.

Like most people, I struggle with transitions, particularly with endings.  Most of the time, endings of books or movies do not seem too bad.  They are contrived enough to sufficiently wrap up all the stray bits (though I have been known to give a loud WTF in a movie theater a time or two).  But in life, endings are rarely that tidy.

In the past I have had trouble specifically with endings I have to initiate.  The severing of relationships, romantic or otherwise, has never been easy.  I want to see the best in people, I want to help people, I want people to like me.  So it is hard to admit that sometimes it is just better to walk away.  I often second guess the decision, and carry around a lot of guilt over it.  Decisions to leave past jobs have also been difficult, even though I knew they were the right decisions.

Photo Courtesy of Joey Rozier
The older I get, the more I am able to reframe the concept of ending.  When one thing ends, another begins.  That is why, when you graduate from school, the ceremony is called commencement.  Commencement means beginning.  So, while it is fine to mourn the ending of one thing, it is also a chance to celebrate the beginning of another thing.  For example, the happiest part of my life started when my days as a single woman ended.

In short, sometimes endings suck.  Ending mean saying goodbye to a person, place, thing, or concept.  Even when you are saying goodbye to something unhealthy or damaging, it is hard.  Ask any addict.  But by saying goodbye, you are also saying hello.  From every ending comes a beginning.  And beginnings, well, I think those are pretty awesome.

NaBloPoMo November